THE OLAMPIC GAMES

 

THE OLAMPIC GAMES

 

Transcript for subtitles of the popular tv show (Leuven BE, recorded 23.11.2037)

archived by strzeka

 

            – Welcome back for the seventh match in the current series of the Olampic Games. We’re in sunny Leuven, Belgium, in the town’s water park and joined by teams from the home country, the Netherlands, France, Germany and Switzerland. As always, all the competitors are amputees and they’re all competing for the grand prize of fifteen million euros which the winning team will share among themselves. Without further ado, let’s get started. Katy?

 

            – Thank you, Stewart. The teams have selected pairs of athletes for our first game, Afternoon Tea. Out in the lake, hitched up to an island, are five enormous teacups resting precariously on small saucers. Very dainty! The first team member will swim across to their cup and saucer, bring it to shore, climb into the cup and the other team member will then jump in the water and tow it back to the island. The teams are raring to go so let’s get started. Three, two, one – go!

 

            – The Dutchmen are already in the water and the Swiss is hopping along. There he goes. Belgium, France and Germany last of all. Germany giving up a little time now with the legless boy having to swing to the water on his hands but he’ll be less weight in the cup. All the swimmers making good time. The German lad is going to overtake the Frenchman, the lad with no hands. Switzerland releasing their cup and saucer and they’re going to collide with France if they’re not careful. Belgium and Germany trying to find the rope. Here they come. Germany catching up. Strong arms on this lad. Switzerland and Germany back on shore now and they’re climbing into the cup for a ride back to the island.

 

Oh! Switzerland nearly takes a tumble. The cups are easily unbalanced when they’re carrying a team member. The German boy has disappeared altogether, hunkering down in the cup. His partner is missing an arm but is powering away, taking the lead. All the teams on their way back to the island now – and France has capsized! They’re both in the water. If they can get the cup upright and climb back in out here on the water it’ll be a miracle. The blond lad is having trouble reaching the lip with those short stumps. Is he going to make it? No! They’re back in the drink. The Belgian and German teams are at the island. The first team to have both members on dry land will be the winners. And a great vault there from the legless German and they take first place. Belgium in second, the two tall Dutchmen are going to pip the Swiss and France has given up. They’ve been fished out of the drink and brought back to shore. They must be disappointed. The other teams are being brought back too. We’ll have a word with the German boys in a minute. Stewart! What have you got for us next?

 

            – Thank you, Katy. Next up is Bucketing Down. One of the team members climbs a five metre high ladder and pours a bucketful of water into another one held by the other member, who has to run thirty metres to the weighing station. Team with the most water wins. Ready? On your marks, set, go!

 

Everyone is wearing their artificial limbs, it seems. This game calls for both arms and legs, a strong grip and a steady aim. Belgium and France are scooting up the ladder hanging on with hooks. The other teams are using artificial legs. France has reached their bucket but is having difficulty getting a grip with two slippery sockets. The German lad looks precarious balancing on the ladder with two fake legs. Is he going to be able to lift the bucket? Yes! His team mate is ready to catch the water in his own bucket, wobbling a bit, trying to balance on his artificial legs. And he gets an eyeful of water! This is not as easy as it looks. The Swiss team are taking things slowly, taking careful aim. It’s going in the bucket, most of it. Germany hasn’t managed to catch much water. The Swiss are ready. Oh! The lad is using a peg leg. Good to see old style prosthetics in use. He reaches the scales and the result is seven point nine litres. France is next with six point six. That must have hurt – the lad has shaken his hooks off and is massaging his stumps. Here comes Belgium and Netherlands, doing the hop-skip-and-run with a fake leg each. Let’s see their results. The German lad brought only three litres, the boys from the Low Countries have just over five each. So the win goes to the Swiss lads, high-fiving each other with a pair of hooks. Well done, lads. Katy, what have you got for us?

 

            – Well, Stewart. After all that strenuous effort, it’s time to calm things down with a spot of culture. The teams have each picked an artist who will try to reproduce a picture according to instructions given by the other team members. They’re standing fifteen metres away and will have to shout their instructions. They have three minutes and the best result wins. Let’s see what they have to draw. Haha! A circus clown kicking a football and holding an umbrella. Should be easy enough. Are you ready, teams? Trois, deux, un – go!

 

As you might expect, all the teams have chosen an artist with at least one natural hand. The legless German has recovered from his Afternoon Tea and is making a good start. The Belgian, French and Swiss are all screaming their heads off in French. I don’t know how the artists are going to make any sense of their instructions. The one-armed Dutch lad has drawn a stick figure more or less in the correct position. There’s the ruff and the big shoes. And the football. Let’s watch them. What a ruckus! France is coming along nicely. Heaven knows how he can make out what his own team is shouting. One-legged boys holding on to each other for support.

 

And there’s the whistle. Time’s up! The drawings will be collected and displayed for us and the judges. The artists rejoin their teams and we’re about to have a break for a few minutes. We can chat to some of the competitors. Stewart?

 

            – Thanks, Katy. We have with us Claude, the swimmer for France in the Afternoon Tea game. Did you have fun, Claude?

            – Yes, of course. I had to swim around the German boy but we made good time.

            – It was strange to see someone without hands being selected.

            – Oh but I am a strong swimmer anyway. I knew I would still be strong after I had my hands amputated.

            – Ah, so you’re a voluntary amputee.

            – Sure. It’s a great opportunity to win the fifteen million. And I always wanted to wear hooks so I am very happy now with these beautiful stumps and my beautiful hooks.

            – Well, France is doing quite well after your event. Lots of time to catch up.

            – Yes. I was a pity but we will not be last today.

            – Let’s hope so. Thank you, Claude. Over to you, Katy.

 

            – Let’s have a word with Dieter from Germany. Dieter, you were a very good swimmer. Your leg stumps are very short.

            – Yes, unlike Claude I have strong arms. I am legless but quite fast in the water. It was quite easy to get the cup to shore and pull myself into the cup.

            – You disappeared altogether. We couldn’t see you at all.

            – Sorry! I was trying to make myself even smaller. Smaller than I am after I had my legs cut off.

            – Was it an accident?

            – No no. Like Claude, we feel we have a good chance for winning so it was nothing to become an amputee for a chance to win.

            – Do you wear artificial legs, Dieter?

            – My stumps are too small so I walk on my hands or in a wheelchair. It’s cool.

            – Yes, you look very smart. Back to you, Stewart.

 

            – Thank you Katy. The teams are ready for a spot of rowing. Two team members from each country will try rowing their canoe fifty metres. They all have a passenger from another country who is facing the other way and will try to slow them down as much as possible. Teams! Are you ready? On your marks, set, go!

 

France is off to a good start with Claude in front. He has a fine pair of rubberised claws to grip his oar with and is making good progress. Their Swiss passenger is splashing about a lot but not having much effect. Look at the Belgian boat! They’re going backwards. They have a German passenger and he’s paddling furiously in reverse. I think Belgium is going to be in trouble. France and Netherlands slowly pulling ahead together. Oh! The Belgian boat has capsized. The rescue boat is coming to pick them up. Three leg amputees, they’re OK. Not in danger. France in the lead but it’s slow going. The Swiss lad has found his form and is putting his back into it. Two steps forward and one step back. Netherlands and Germany making steady progress, Switzerland about to overtake Germany. The German team are both left arm amputees wearing steel hooks. The Swiss team has four hands so they must be leg amputees. Difficult to balance in a narrow boat with only one leg but it doesn’t seem to be slowing them. They’re approaching the finish line. Germany wins, then France just narrowly beats Switzerland. And here comes Netherlands in fourth place. That was fun. Have you got some more excitement for us, Katy?

 

            – I hope so, Stewart. The next game is the old classic Tower of Hanoi. The five rings on the left pole need to be moved to the right pole with the largest on the bottom and smallest on the top again, in order. But at no point in the game must a larger disk be placed on top of a smaller one. The full team of six competitors can take part as the teams themselves decide. The challenge here is the poles are ten metres apart. They’re going to have to run back and forth quite a lot. Let’s see how they get on. Are you ready, teams? Attention! Trois, deux, un – start!

 

Off to a good start. The teams whose members have their legs or one artificial leg are going to be at a distinct advantage in this game. The Dutch team has three competitors each on two artificial legs so they’ll be worth keeping an eye on. There is a logic to this puzzle but it remains to be seen if any of these young men realise it. Two teams have placed the smallest ring on the middle pole and are taking the second smallest to the end. Claude is making a huge effort for France. He can run back and forth carrying the rings in his arm stumps with no problem. It seems to me that the legless competitors are content with giving directions to the more active team members. Let’s just watch them for a moment.

 

The two Dutch boys are putting in a good effort but both are having trouble turning around on their two artificial legs. Claude from France is being kept on his toes. If the team’s logic is correct, they’ll be ahead at this stage. No! They now have a bigger ring with nowhere to put it. Claude will have to rearrange the others first before he can put it down. His team mate is helping him while Claude watches.

 

Germany is halfway through. With only one legless member, the other competitors can take part. Dieter is pointing out which discs have to be moved and it looks like the others are taking directions from him.

 

And it looks like Germany is going to win. They’ve done it. Well done! France is almost there. Oh! Dieter is shouting advice to the other teams. I think he knows the logic. There! Finished. That was fun, wasn’t it, Stewart?

            – It was great to see them working as a team. That’s all for this time. Join us in two weeks time when we’ll be in Stockholm for the heats between Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Finland and the UK when more young amputees will be putting themselves to the test in the hope of the fifteen million euro grand prize. From Katy and me in Leuven, Belgium, good night and stay safe.

 

–  E N D   C R E D I T S  –

 

THE OLAMPIC GAMES